I Doubt You'll Find Any Doctors or Nurses Protesting at State Capitols

So what do I think of the people who have seen fit to protest stay at home measures at state capitols in Michigan, North Carolina, Kentucky and those planning to protest in Washington, Oregon and Texas?

I think these people are a bunch of fucking idiots.

When someone claims, “The hospitals are empty. Nobody is sick with COVID. All of these COVID deaths are being attributed to COVID that aren’t COVID deaths,” then I shall call you a fucking idiot.

These protests might include people who carry AK-47s, wave Confederate flags or Trump-Pence banners, but you will not find any doctors or nurses at these gatherings (at least not ones who are currently working in a hospital setting). But I have a feeling that those who do carry AK-47s, wave Confederate flags or Trump-Pence banners might soon be in need of a doctor, a nurse and perhaps a ventilator.

Speaking of medical professionals, here is a harrowing account from Dr. Helen Ouyang, a New York ER physician:

When I walk through the hospital doors, the E.R. is a place I no longer recognize. Intubated patients, of every age, are on ventilators everywhere. It feels simultaneously electrifying and oppressive. But it’s also eerily quiet. Family members and friends haven’t been allowed into the E.R. for more than a week; most of the patients are too sick to talk; the few without breathing tubes who are able to cough are muffled by their masks. Oxygen hisses in the background. A couple of hours into my shift, one of the nurses comes to me. She falls apart, tears streaming down her inflamed, marked cheeks. She sobs out words of anger and frustration and sadness. The morning, on top of the last several days, has crushed her. I want to hug her, but I can’t.

Soon after that, someone asks, “Doctor, is it OK to take the patient to the morgue?” The other physician on duty and I look at each other. The morgue? Who just died? Apparently, a patient who was waiting for an inpatient bed, whose family had decided against extreme resuscitative measures, had died, without us even knowing.

Several days ago, only a few patients had Covid, but suddenly it seems we have become, like facilities in Italy, a Covid hospital. Every patient seems to test positive for it. I am shocked by the one or two negative results I receive during a shift. We have to function as if everyone is infected.

A co-worker tells me he used three masks during the course of his shift. Three masks?! I respond. That’s crazy! Then I realize I am the absurd one. The masks are meant for single use, one per patient encounter; my colleague had used three masks over a 12-hour shift, most likely having seen upward of 30 patients who potentially have Covid. It’s idiotic that I was shocked by his using three masks, especially when many of our co-workers in the city have fallen ill.

Patients who test positive for the virus are unintentionally roomed with those who test negative or whose tests are still pending, because the E.R. is bursting. Even if we are exposed to a patient without proper personal protective equipment, we are expected to return to work if we don’t have symptoms. In Italy, where 61 doctors have already died from Covid (a number that will grow past 100 in the next couple of weeks), health care workers believe that they themselves expedited the spread of the virus. There, the doctors are routinely tested for any exposures, even if they are asymptomatic.

I have to shut down thoughts about my own risks and mortality. I recall the words of my old mentor, but I don’t think I can do this job unless I force myself to believe in my own invincibility. Otherwise, with every violation of the protective barrier, every instance of less-than-ideal protection, which is almost every time, I would be paralyzed by thoughts of having infected myself. I see a patient around my age intubated, hear about a hospital colleague getting critically ill. A co-worker texts that her classmate from residency is now intubated. I read an article about how health care workers seem to suffer more from serious Covid infections, even if they’re young, possibly as a result of being exposed to higher initial doses of the virus. I’m not even sure this is true anymore — I’ve seen plenty of critically ill patients in their 30s and 40s. I push these thoughts away, immediately. Better to be lucky than to be good, I remind myself. It’s the only thing that provides some reassurance. If I feel like it’s not totally in my control, then I won’t completely lose my mind over every mistake I make donning and removing my P.P.E. and recycling single-use equipment.

So please don't tell me that COVID-19 is just the flu. Do not tell me that people aren't getting sick.

Look, I hate being out of work and not knowing when I'll find another job. I hate being stuck in an apartment (albeit a nice one) for 23 hours a day. And when I do go outside to get groceries, I hate having to go outside wearing a mask. But the alternative is much, much worse.

Those who are protesting at state capitols might exclaim, "Don't tread on us." But by gathering you risk infecting and killing others. So in reality the protesters are treading on us.

If it is a choice between listening to a bunch of people carrying AK-47s, Confederate flags and Trump-Pence banners or listening to doctors and nurses I shall listen to doctors and nurses every single time.